


For a Charm of Powerful Trouble

by sablesheep



Series: Red Letter Days [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Frustrated closet sex, Halloween, more holiday nonsense, totally not canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-10
Updated: 2015-11-10
Packaged: 2018-04-30 22:37:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5182214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sablesheep/pseuds/sablesheep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone should have plans on Halloween, especially when you own a really expensive pirate costume you had made for when you drag your kids to Renaissance Fairs every weekend. Or for when you're trying really hard to get your girlfriend in bed and she's refusing to get the picture. Mindfang is absolutely oblivious and Rosa might strangle her. Featuring Mindfang's robot arm doing home damage, children causing ridiculous problems and some great stories about Mindfang's family. And some gratuitous public sex because, hey, that's always fun.</p>
<p>(Mindfang and Rosa just after they've started dating and things are still a little awkward. And then Porrim gets arrested which, you know. Really doesn't help anything, at all).</p>
            </blockquote>





	For a Charm of Powerful Trouble

**Author's Note:**

  * For [THE OCELOT](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=THE+OCELOT), [NEW ZEALAND VAMPIRE BAT](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=NEW+ZEALAND+VAMPIRE+BAT).



> Returning from the dead. Prequel-ish to Tidings, again using the naming conventions of Deep Waters-- Mindfang occasionally referred to as 'Vienna' because it's less of a mouthful. Aradia's ancestor makes an appearance, vaguely. Because who else would be throwing a Halloween party? 
> 
> This probably needs a lot more editing, but it's 4:30am and I've got a doctor's appointment at 9, so... Forgive me. 
> 
> (Title from _Macbeth_ VI.i.)

Mindfang’s only half dressed when she hears her intercom buzzing. Swearing profusely, she rushes out of her closet and into the foyer, fumbling to answer the call. Rosa stares back at her, still so beautiful that Mindfang can barely stand it. You’d think some of that would have worn off after three months but, nope. She’s still gorgeous.

“Hey sweetheart!” She says, trying to keep her voice semi-normal. It fails, automatically, at the use of the word ‘sweetheart’. Not really her favorite pet name, but, hey, could be worse. “Come on up. The door’s unlocked, just let yourself in.”

“Thanks.” She says, arching an eyebrow and waving with a crook of her fingers. 

Mindfang hangs up before she can keep being awkward, tripping over her own feet to get back to the closet. It’d taken her longer than usual to get ready, what with her parents being late to pick up the kids, Vriska being unable to remember where her Halloween costume was, Aranea dithering about what books to bring and her father, as always, interrogating her doorman. Curling her hair had been, again, a fucking train wreck—none of it got burnt off, but it doesn’t look nearly as good as it could. Luckily she’ll be wearing a hat, or it’d be more of a disaster. 

She uses the remaining minutes between now and Rosa’s arrival to finish her makeup, struggling to apply lipstick with a shaky hand. Fuck everything, this is a disaster. Every time she’s seen Rosa this past week she’s been a nervous wreck. Some if it could be due to stress but Mindfang’s pretty willing to attribute it to the fact that after three months _they still haven’t had sex_. Waiting for Rosa to make the first move has gone from annoying to frustrating to, now, sort of nerve inducing. It feels like when she got engaged to her ex-husband—she knew he was going to propose, but not when, so it was like a month of trying to look nice all the time, just in case he appeared with the stupid ring. She hated that ring. Besssssst part of getting divorced was not having to wear the stupid ring anymore. Family heirloom my ass.

In this situation, however, she’s waiting for Rosa to get her into bed. And instead of, you know, just having to look nice for pictures, she has to look nice _naked_ which is way harder. 

Rosa still knocks when she gets upstairs, waiting the appropriate ten seconds before letting herself in. Mindfang listens to her heels snicking across the marble flooring, taking a deep breath. Okay, Vienna. You’ve got this. Don’t lose your shit. 

The pep talk doesn’t work. Rosa appears in the doorway of her bathroom, a tall, breathtaking figure smiling shyly. Fuck why is she so cute? And why is she so attractive? WHY IS ANY OF THIS HAPPENING TO HER?

"You look great." That's like, the biggest understatement she's made since she lost her arm, called her mother from the hospital and said 'I tripped' instead of anything that would convey the severity of the situation. In this case she's saying 'you look great' when she means to say 'you look so devastatingly attractive it's going to be catastrophic'. 

Catastrophic because she has spent the past few months on her best fucking behavior, by which she means NO FUCKING and. Um. All that effort to be considerate and think about making Rosa happy and planning out about sixteen different strategies is going to be... for absolutely nothing because there is no way Rosa's going to make it home tonight. 

Right now it seems unlikely that they're going to make it out of her apartment. There isn't much to that dress so it shouldn't be too hard to get it off in less than ten seconds. God what is she even wearing under that? She's really hoping for black lace anything. 

Mindfang exhales slowly. Not that it matters, though. Nope. Nope nope nope. Because she's waiting for Rosa. Waiting for Rosa to make the first move. That's what you do when your girlfriend hasn't slept with anyone since she divorced her husband. You don't tell her 'hey so I know you've been in the closet for like thirty five years and we've been dating for three months but you've totally had enough time to get over any discomfort you may feel over becoming physically intimate with a woman for the first time'. You back off and wait for her to suggest it. 

No matter how attractive she is or how red her lipstick is. Even then you do not, do _not_ rip her clothes off, throw her over your shoulder and carry her into the bedroom. Because... that's wrong. 

"Vienna? Are you okay?"

"Yeah-- yeah I'm just really happy to see you."

"Thank you." 

"I like your dress. It's. It's very. Um. It's very nice."

Rosa glances down at herself and smooths out the black velvet. It's short. It's low cut. And it is very tight. Just. Very, very tight. And? Um? Shit she's staring. "Thank you. I confiscated it from my daughter as being too inappropriate to wear in public."

"Yeah I can see that. I can definitely see why." She laughs a little too hard, choosing to focus on her lipstick instead of the way her girlfriend looks. This isn't a good solution because Rosa isn't, in fact, a real vampire so she _has a reflection_ and that reflection has just as much cleavage as she does. 

"Can you? I didn't think you'd be able to." There's an emphasis on that sentence that does not bode well. It's the kind of conversational marker that usually means she's done something wrong. When Rosa talks like that it usually means she's being passive-aggressive as all fuck. Normally, she can figure out what she's done wrong and compensate. But like. Rosa literally just got here. Literally. Was she not complimentary enough? Was she too complimentary? 

"Nope, definitely. It's..." Really hot? Too tight? Your breasts look too nice? I want to shove you against the wall and fuck you? Can we do that, please? "Well. Velvet is very hard to keep clean."

"Yes. Of course. That was my concern. That it would have to be dry cleaned." Rosa's glare is venomous, even in the glass. Mindfang avoids it, pulling her overcoat on with a flourish. The coat settles around her like insurance against sullen vampires. You know what also helps? Wearing a sword. Sure, she probably shouldn't wear weapons in public! But--

"Isn't that your Ren fair costume?" Rosa asks, frowning. She reaches up to straighten the collar of her coat and Mindfang catches a hint of her perfume. She hasn't seen Rosa in days and she sort of wants a hug, at the very least. But no, justtttttt the collar straightening. 

"Yes, yes it is." Mindfang grins, a little. “I'm surprised you recognize it. Nicely done."

"You texted me a picture from the last time you wore it. The corset is memorable."

"It fucking better be, it was a custom job. Took like a year and a half to get done. So did the coat but, like, at least the coat covers more terrain."

Rosa snorts, for no understandable reason and rolls her eyes. Fuck she looks so great. "Unfortunately." 

"So you're a...?"

"Vampire."

"Shouldn't you have a cape?"

"I have teeth." Rosa pulls her upper lip back to show off a pair of fake teeth attached over her real incisors, hopefully with a relatively sticky epoxy instead of something that'll cause some awkwardness later on. Unless she's wearing fake teeth just so she doesn't have to kiss her. That would be sort of mean.

Mindfang considers this and doesn't like the implications. There's only one reason that comes to mind and it doesn’t bode well for her relationship. Is she going to get dumped? She really hopes she isn't because she _really_ likes this woman. She's also _really_ hot right now which would just add insult to injury. "Yesss you do. I see that now."

"So you like the dress?"

"It's very nice, yes."

"And you like it... on _me_ specifically or just an item of clothing?"

"Uh. Both, I guess?" Mindfang glances down at her wrist. She is not, and never does, wear a wristwatch. She hopes Rosa doesn't notice this, or they're going to have problems. "We'd better get going or we'll be late."

She rushes Rosa to the door, hopefully before she notices anything's amiss. Judging from her scowl, Mindfang isn't successful. Fuck. She's not normally scared on Halloween because she makes a point of not watching horror movies. But she's 88% sure that her girlfriend breaking up with her is the most fucking terrifying thing she could possibly live through tonight.

Provided Rosa isn't, you know, an actual vampire. In that case, the most terrifying thing she could live through tonight is getting her throat ripped out and her sheets bloodstained so badly she'll have to buy new ones.

* * *

The Megido's apartment is only a few blocks away. They walk, despite the height of Rosa's heels, both of them enjoying the cold night. Rosa because she seems to like that sort of thing (because, as she puts it, 'the desert is the fucking worst') and Mindfang because it cools her libido down a little bit. In that she's fucking freezing and thinking about sex is put on a backburner. 

Rosa makes a really attractive vampire. Like, as far as costumes go she did a great job of getting into character. Mindfang wonders if she should point out how hot she looks or if that would be rude. Probably rude, right? Like? She wants to respect Rosa's feelings because, for the first time in nearly twenty years, she's met someone she likes someone so much she's almost scared to say it out loud. If she has to pick between temporary celibacy and never seeing Rosa again, she'd take a vow of chastity just to see her happy. Well, so long as said vow of chastity excludes masturbation because there is a limit to everyone's self-control. 

"So. Tonight is the first time in months that I've been able to do whatever I want without worrying. Do you know why?"

"No, Pet, why?"

"Because my daughters are staying with their father and I don't have to work. So there won't be anyone to notice if I don't make it home in time for breakfast."

Wow there are just so many things that come to mind right now. Mindfang's eye twitches beneath her eyepatch. Is God testing her? God might be testing her. Just. Remember. You want to keep this woman. Taking her up on this offer might mean you lose her. 

"You've earned it, I'm sure." Mindfang murmurs, squeezing her hand. She looks momentarily flustered, eyebrows migrating towards each other. "Could we get breakfast tomorrow then?"

"Yes? But. I mean. Could I stay over tonight?"

Yes. In my bed. With me. Naked. Probably not sleeping because I have spent three months-- MORE, even-- wanting you. Mindfang inhales, slowly, then exhales sharply. "If you're worried about getting home, I do have a driver? And, like, a car, so..."

"Um. I'd really prefer to stay, if that won't upset you."

"Of course not-- whatever you want. I've got like, four bedrooms in my apartment, so..."

"Yes, but what if I wanted to stay in a _particular_ room? Would _that_ be okay?"

Wow, is that what this is about? Seriously? In three months she hasn't done more than kiss the woman, but she's still concerned that staying overnight will come with some sort of sinister caveat. Has she not been careful enough? She's done her very, very best to keep Rosa from being aware of how much she wants her but _still_ she's scared she's going to be pressured into something. "Rosa, I'm not going to make you sleep with me if we don't want it."

"Um. I'm a little concerned you don't understand what I'm trying to get at, Vienna."

"No, no I understand you perfectly."

Rosa stares, clearly shocked that Mindfang isn't some degenerate moron unable to think past the carnal pleasures of the flesh. Spoiler alert, she totally is. She married her husband mostly just to have kids! She had to sleep with him _twice_. Or, like, a lot more than that. But at least twice _specifically_ to get pregnant. 

"Are you trying to tell me you know what I'm trying to tell you but you don't feel the same way?" Rosa frowns. Mindfang jabs the elevator button a few times, just to kill some time. Shit, she's not sure what they're talking about now. Shit, shit, shit. 

The elevator dings and Mindfang all but leaps through the doors. Rosa doesn't follow, waiting for her answer. She's worrying the inside of her cheek with her tongue, a nervous habit she starts up whenever she feels out of her depth. 

"No... No I don't...?" Mindfang hazards, hoping this is the correct response. She's pretty sure she just said 'you think I'm going to pressure you to put out but I am not going to do that and so I disagree with you'. "Rosa, I'm sorry but this is-- really hard for me to talk about, okay? Can we change the subject?"

Rosa resumes a facial expression that suggests she's considering framing her for murder. Mindfang doesn't feel wholly safe being in an elevator with her, but it's only to the thirteenth floor. It's the most awkward elevator ride she's ever had but, hey, at least she makes it through without hitting the emergency stop, shoving Rosa against the wall and. Um. Behaving inappropriately. 

* * *  
"Rosa this is Nekane Megido. She's an artist-- she did that painting I have in my living room that you like? Nekane, this is my girlfriend, Rosa."

Rosa doesn't look super friendly. She mostly looks super fucking pissed off. But she manages to make herself smile, even though her eyes mainly focus on the rest of the party. There are at least fifty people crammed onto the apartment's ground floor, with a few stray partygoers hanging over the suspended staircase. There is, more importantly, a hell of a lot of alcohol circulating. 

"So. How have the muses been treating you?" Mindfang asks to cover the awkwardness, wondering how fast she can get drunk. One 

"Not interested in me right now, I'm afraid. I've been having a three month dry spell."

"Me too." Rosa says, smiling, somehow having obtained a cocktail before Nekane can offer to get her one. 

"Sorry?"

"Rosa works with kids, so that's a good thing for her." Mindfang actually has no idea what that's about. Her immediate thought is, um, well. The usual adult meaning of 'dry spell' that's non-meteorological, which would be three months free of sex. This is, coincidentally, how long they’ve been dating. But that's probably just her projecting because Rosa would have made a move by now if she was interested.

Rosa doesn't elaborate as she's too busy finishing her drink. Mindfang coaxes her further into the party and manages to find a drink of her own, as well as a second one for Rosa. Rosa doesn't seem interested in talking to Mindfang, let alone anyone else.

Shit, did she do something wrong? She had to have, right? Did she somehow fail a test? Because she is not going to blow this, not after three months. She'll do just about anything to get this right. Half because Rosa’s really hot and half because she really likes her.

Various acquaintances approach as they notice her, each of them expressing happiness to finally meet Rosa. Rosa expressing about... no interest whatsoever in any of them. It's actually sort of bitchy but there's probably a good reason, isn't there?

Things do not improve as the party goes on. Rosa seems less openly hostile, but she is drinking much more heavily than normal. And glaring a lot more. And talking a lot less. All of which could be chalked up to "I'm shy because I don't know anyone here but my girlfriend" but only with supreme self-delusion. Still, she doesn't seem at all willing to leave Mindfang's side. Every attempt to break off from her for even a minute is greeted with an icy glare. 

"So, what do you do for a living?" A particularly brave woman asks. 

Rosa swishes the ice around in her drink, one of her cheek muscles throbbing. "Not _her_." A gesture towards Mindfang makes it pretty obvious what she's referencing. 

"Did I do something wrong?" Mindfang asks, softly, once the poor woman has all but sprinted across the room.

"More like you haven't done _anything_."

That is about as unhelpful as you can possibly get. 

After that, every woman that approaches to say hello is quickly fobbed off by Rosa's glaring or seem affronted by the fact that-- and Mindfang says this without bias-- Rosa's easily the most attractive woman in the room. 

Eventually they're down to Ted, the only agent at her publishing firm too relentlessly cheery to realize how much of a massive festering asshole he is when he drinks. Sober Ted is really great, bakes a lot of cupcakes and likes to visit his husband's yoga studio during lunch so he's limbered up in time for the tae kwon do classes he teaches to small children. Sober Ted is a badass. Drunk Ted, unlike Sober Ted, has no sense of social boundaries and likes to tell crass jokes at the worst time possible. 

He is, in short, the last person Mindfang thinks Rosa should meet. But he's on his way over and since no one else is stepping forward, it's going to happen. 

"So, Vienna, I see you're a pirate again!" He says, chortling. How is this funny? Like, seriously, how is this funny at all? 

She glances down at herself, wondering how the combination of a corset, sword, flouncy overcoat, hat with a stupidly overlarge feather and a fucking eyepatch somehow indicates that she _isn't_ a pirate. "Yep."

"And this is, um? An overpriced escort." Ted laughs at his own joke while elbowing her in the ribs and trying to wink. His laugh is the most offensive of the combination, a weird obnoxious wheeze that she hates. Mindfang considers kicking him in the shins, but that never works as well as she thinks it will. Rosa, surprisingly, doesn't seem offended by the joke, mostly because she's already so pissed off that the only possible step up on the "Angry Vampire" meter is, uh. Vehicular manslaughter. As things currently stand, her only response to being asked if she's a prostitute is to finish the rest of her drink and stare, unblinkingly, at Ted's neck. 

Mindfang does the sensible thing and hands Rosa her half-full glass of sangria. "No, Ted, this is my girlfriend. She is a vampire. Show him your fangs, sweetheart."

Rosa growls. It's not, you know. Showing her fangs but she supposes? That? Works okay? Um. What the _hell is wrong with her tonight_?

"Haha, well, whatever you say! She's much better looking than the escort you brought last year!"

"Ted, like I told you last year, that was my mother. And just like last year, this is a real sword."

"You brought your mother to a Halloween party?" Rosa mutters, cheeks quirking up into a nice, friendly smirk. "Couldn't get a date?"

"Rosa, you seem to think that my mother is above scaring off any of my romantic partners she decides she's bored with. She is not. She is definitely not. She tries to plan my romantic life to ensure that she'll have fun at Christmas."

"What was I supposed to think when she showed up dressed like she was in the mob or something? She even had a violin case!"

"TED. I TOLD YOU. SHE IS. SHE IS PART OF THE MAFIA."

"Is she really?"

"Well, no. She worked for the FBI as part of a special task force working against the mafia, which is how she met my father."

"Isn't fraternization with fellow agents frowned upon?"

"No idea, but probably not as frowned upon as _hooking up with_ the man you were sent to arrest then refusing to either break up with him or, you know. Quit."

"Why didn't they just fire her?"

"Yeah, they did. But she accused them of gender discrimination because it was right after she told them she was pregnant and may or may not have made a lot of money off of the US government."

"Is that why you're so rich?" Rosa mutters, looking less-than-amused by this.

"No, my mom's descended from Vikings who relocated to Denmark at some point, married into Danish nobility... immigrated from Denmark sometime in the1800s and made a lot of money on the stock market. And, uh, by shorting the stock market. And it sort of went on like that for three generations before my mother became a lawyer." She shrugs. "And Dad's family made money from 'real estate' but actually just build a small empire during prohibition selling bootleg liquor and never really stopped."

"I thought your mother was an FBI agent." Rosa's following this conversation much better than most people manage to. Mindfang might actually invite her home for Thanksgiving this year, which is usually much less violent than Christmas.

"No, she was the legal consultant on the FBI taskforce tasked with taking down my father's gang. That’s also why my father never went to jail and was able to keep all his ill-gotten gains."

"What makes her part of the mafia?"

"She's their lawyer now. We just. Don't talk about it very often."

"Did he kill people?"

"NO! No, they're like... The lame as fuck mafia that specializes in black market booze, illegally imported cheese and, well, stolen artwork."

"That's a little disappointing."

"Yeah, well, every Christmas invariably ends with them trying to shoot each other, one of the other gang members trying to stab one of my mom's old FBI buddies and, uh, you know. My sending my daughters into the basement until their grandparents stop fighting about who's Sauron and who's Saruman."

"Your family isn't celebrating Christmas right."

"ONCE AGAIN, TED, I AM JEWISH."

"Your parents, too?"

"YES TED, THAT'S GENERALLY HOW IT WORKS."

"Doesn't your mom have some ridiculous nickname, too? Like? Eight Ball? Or? um? Snowball?"

"You're thinking of cocaine, Ted. But yes, yes she does. Her officially designated code name was Snowman. Because of the time she literally shot a snowman into a puddle because she was tripping balls on cocaine and thought he was a hired assassin."

"Holy shit."

"Yeah that’s why she refused to send me to boarding school in Switzerland. Not because of the drugs but because she still, um, doesn't trust snowmen in general."

"And your dad?"

"Dude he goes by like sixteen different nicknames that I'm not even sure who he is at the moment. Or where he is. My kids call him Grandpa Jack and we are sticking with that. He is also missing an eye. Oh, and one time he hid inside of a snowman and attempted to murder my mother."

"How does your girlfriend not know anything about your family? Are you _sure_ she's not a prostitute?"

Rosa’s smile could induce a sugar high in a nearly sugar-inured child at a carnival. And then poison them. Maybe she’s thinking of antifreeze instead of candy? "No, I'm not. Because prostitutes usually _get laid_ at some point."

"What was that about?" Ted asks, curiously, glancing between the two of them.

Mindfang tries for an awkward laugh. It just sounds scared. "We haven't slept together yet."

"No, we _haven't_." Rosa concurs, vehemently, in a tone of voice normally reserved for awkward conversations about politics at Christmas.

"Will you excuse us for a moment, Ted?" Mindfang says, trying to keep this from getting too awkward. "I need to talk to my girlfriend for a few minutes. We'll be riiiiight back."

* * *

She drags Rosa over to the guest bedroom being used as the coat check, slamming the door behind her. Rosa, however, is the one to lock it, scowling so darkly that Mindfang would feel safer with the lights out. 

"Rosa what the _hell_ is going on--"

"GET IN THE CLOSET." She snarls, pointing at the open door of a large walk in. Mindfang stares. 

"No, no I am not going to get into the closet--"

"GET IN THE CLOSET." Rosa bellows, stomping one of her feet and _shoving_ Mindfang towards it.

"Okay, okay, yeesh, I'm going!" Rosa is scary when she feels like it, and right now she's definitely feeling like it. It's hot. But also not great because, like. This is going to become a compromising situation if she doesn't find a way to hide.

Rosa shoves the closet door shut. Mindfang edges to the back of the long, narrow space, wondering what the hell is about to happen. Is her girlfriend going to murder her? Is there a reason they're going to fight in here instead of just leaving the party? Why does it need to be a confined space, she hates confined spaces. She's about to die, isn't she?

It sure as hell seems like it as Rosa menaces towards her, snapping her heels into the hardwood with such force it seems like she's become a lumberjack. Or something-- look she's aroused, she's eaten a lot of candy, and she's like. Sort of drunk after stress drinking over her girlfriend acting like she was going to stab someone for most of the nice. It's hard to keep her brain working efficiently when both sober Mindfang and drunk-ish Mindfang _really want to fuck her_.

"Rosa what the _fuck_ is going on right now?" She tries, in a last ditch effort to regain control of the situation. She likes being in control of every situation, all the time, always. Like Michael Bluth except for, like, her family's never been caught committing treason. The operative word there being 'caught'. 

She's close enough now that Mindfang can smell her perfume and hairspray, the organic kind that her daughter probably makes her use. "I have been waiting for _THREE MONTHS_ for you to make a move on me and I am SICK AND TIRED OF IT. So we are not leaving this closet until you fuck me."

Oh-kay. That's not what she expected to hear. Mindfang raises her arms in a gesture of placating surrender. Apparently they aren't going to have to fight, which is _great_. "Um, Rosa--"

Rosa doesn't notice her in the slightest, rubbing at her forehead with the heel of her palm. She's harrying her bottom lip with her costume fangs, small smudges of lipstick coming off on whatever the teeth are made of. Mindfang hasn't kissed her yet to night, so she hasn't had a chance to figure that out. "I have tried _everything_. EVERYTHING. And you haven't even _noticed_."

Mindfang thinks back over the past few months and can remember, in remarkable detail each one of these attempts. Mostly because she went home after each of those dates and fantasized about them at length while she got herself off. Which isn't weird because they're dating. But, you know. At the time she sort of assumed that it was either inadvertent or her libido being too strong for her own good. But there has been a gradual increase in revealing clothing, sultry comments, insinuations about spending some 'private' time together 'without any children' and, you know. Maybe a few obviously sexual text messages that Mindfang sort of assumed were... accidentally erotic? She's not sure what she was thinking in that particular case. "Um, no, I noticed."

"Oh, but it was so awful that you didn't want to embarrass me by acknowledging it?" Rosa sounds like she's about to cry, but reaching out to hug her doesn't seem like an option. Mindfang sucks at that anyways. 

She shakes her head as violently as possible without dislodging her hat. "No, Rosa, that's not--"

"Are you not attracted to me? Because if you're not I can't keep doing this. I cannot keep doing this. I want to sleep with you too badly to agree to a... a... sexless relationship--" She's working herself up into a frenzy, voice going from its usual mellow sardonic tone to a much higher pitched, and to be frank, pretty fucking annoying one. Mostly because Mindfang is really awful at dealing with this shit. 

"Rosa, will you please--"

"NO I WILL NOT. I AM NOT GOING TO BE DOING A FUCKING THING UNTIL YOU JUST SHUT THE HELL UP AND FUCK ME!"

"WILL YOU CALM DOWN? YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SAID YOU'D NEVER BEEN WITH A WOMAN BEFORE!"

"WHEN DID I SAY THAT?"

"BEFORE WE STARTED-- before we started dating!" Mindfang lowers her voice rapidly as the party music suddenly surges. Shit they're at a party at someone else's house they should _not_ be doing this. "You told me you hadn't slept with anyone since you'd left your husband!"

Rosa doesn't seem to have nearly as many concerns about being overheard. Which is funny, because for the past several months, she's been under the impression that _Rosa_ was the prude and she was the obnoxiously sex-crazed one. But she's never shoved anyone into a closet and demanded sex before, so, she might be wrong about those labels. "OH MY GOD! I was gay before I married him, you know!"

Mindfang nods, dumbly. Are you serious? Are you... are you serious? She wants to ask Rosa this, but she also doesn't, um. Want to get choked out. And asking her 'are you serious' will totally get her choked out.

"Am I really that unattractive to you?" Rosa mumbles, self-consciously staring down at herself as she runs an anxious hand through her hair. There is absolutely nothing about her that's unattractive: tight dress, high heels, that stupid lipstick, the fact that her hair is so short that her neck is continuously bare-- she could go on ad nauseum, and might if she thought Rosa would listen.

Ethically, she shouldn't be agreeing to anything while they've both been drinking. Rosa doesn't seem drunk, though, just drunk enough to give no fucks. Mindfang usually doesn't give any fucks and she's spent most of this evening trying not to think about how unrealistically hot her girlfriend is and fielding passive aggressive comments about their sex life. She is, in fact, _incredibly_ attractive. And where exactly does she get off assuming she's unattractive? Fuck that shit, she's wearing an insanely tight dress and Mindfang's got a weakness for red lipstick.

Mindfang grabs her and kisses her, twisting her good hand into Rosa's hair and yanking backwards. Rosa hisses and stumbles backwards, landing against the wall with a thunk. She isn't at all put off by the abrupt transition from fighting to affection and kisses back for all she's worth. She's a good kisser, always has been. But it's a lot more enjoyable when Mindfang can let herself get into it. Up until now all their encounters have been overshadowed by the knowledge that they won't be having sex so Mindfang's been consciously avoiding being caught up in it. But now? Noooot a problem. Rosa's hands roam from her neck to her shoulder blades in restless circuits. 

Fuck, why did she pick a costume that covers so much skin? She can feel Rosa's hands on her back, but it's without the actually gratifying sensation of skin-to-skin contact. Still, she'll take it. Rosa's panting is an additional bonus, picking up as Mindfang's hands smooth over the contours of her neck down to her shoulders. Her skin is cold but soft beneath Mindfang's hand, twitching slightly in response to her touch. She curls her hand around Rosa's jaw and brushes her thumb over Rosa's cheek. She breaks off their kiss to moan, nuzzling into her hand while she shudders. Mindfang quickly redirects her attention to the task at hand

Mindfang catches her lips again. Rosa keeps moaning in an unabashed display of desire. The eventual moaning is also pretty damn nice. She tugs Rosa's bottom lip between her teeth and Rosa hisses, throwing her arms around Mindfang's neck and yanking. 

This isn't one of those hookups that's going to require any strategic thinking. It's not a carefully planned seduction and it sure as hell isn't meant to be languid and emotional. Rosa's a little too eager to enjoy and of that right now. She's already trying to get things moving forward, wrapping one of her legs around Mindfang's hips. It's a tight dress, but it's also very short which, right now, is pretty great. 

Fuck that's hot. Fuck, fuck, fuck. God she wants to be in bed with her right now. Like. Naked, not even bothering to get under the blankets, unable to stop touching her kind of in bed. This was the worst possible moment for Rosa to choose. She couldn't have waited until they were home? Or, possibly, done this before they left home? Then again, the whole fucking in semi-public thing is something new. New and, so far, super fucking great. She breaks off their kiss to take a deep breath. She rests her forehead against Rosa's and smiles at her. Rosa doesn't like that, at all, if the sudden, violent revival of their kiss is anything to gauge by. Wow, she's good with her tongue. Wow, wow-- oh god nope, nope-- 

Wait. Yes, yes, this is okay because they are _definitely going to be fucking_ and she can let herself FULLY APPRECIATE HOW GOOD ROSA IS WITH HER TONGUE. Because, and not to be crass here, there is every possible chance that, in the next few hours, Rosa will go down on her. Which makes imagining that so much more gratifying, you have no idea. Like. The difference between wanting a drink when you get home and knowing you've got some vodka hidden in your shoe closet, behind your favorite pair of hiking boots, and wanting a particular type of whiskey only brewed and casked in a remote island off the coast of Scotland only accessible by seaplane. Sure you might eventually make it out there, but like you don't go out of your way to think about HOW MUCH YOU REALLY WANT THAT DAMN WHISKEY AND HOW YOU CAN'T HAVE IT BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO SCARE IT INTO BREAKING UP WITH YOU. 

But, you know. Now it's actually pretty damn rewarding to imagine the various uses Rosa's tongue can be put to. Mostly between her legs but, you know. Breasts. Neck. Ears. Various parts of the body. Just, lots of options here. Mainly between her legs but she will take _anything_.

Yeah okay, she needs to be touching Rosa right now. In an ideal world she'd move on to her breasts, but this is not an ideal world. It's a strapless velvet dress that's staying up only by virtue of how tight it is. Not that Rosa's flat chested but, like, the dress hasn't slipped at all and she's _shoved against a wall_. It's a tight dress! Getting it back on will be way too hard, getting it off will be time consuming. But she's got a titanium arm and its stretchy velvet so going up the hem is a definite possibility. Which is good because Rosa, despite her apparent sexual frustration, is still wearing underwear. Fucking hell, why, _why_ Rosa, you're getting in your own way.

She shoves Rosa's dress up to her hips. Rosa's head drops against the wall as she exhales sharply. Mindfang reaches out and yanks her underwear down. The angle Rosa's put herself at is making the task far more difficult than it should be. 

"Use both hands!" Rosa finally groans. Mindfang snorts, then gives in and does as requested. Rosa does her best to help but somehow manages to do nothing but get in the way.

"Put your fucking leg down." Mindfang snarls, raking her fingernails up the leg in question. Rosa whimpers, a high pitched, needy sound that's one of the best things she's ever heard. Mindfang inhales slowly. She drops her leg but doesn't do anything more useful. Mindfang looks at her. Rosa stares back, a challenging smirk moving across her cheeks. Fuck she is really attractive when she smiles like that. Mindfang woulllllld very much like to have her back home right now. Being quiet and non-descript is the name of the game. 

Mindfang kisses her softly, their lips barely touching. She slips a hand up Rosa's dress to grab her ass. Rosa tries to kiss her a bit more deeply, but Mindfang pulls away. Before any objections can be raised, she drops to her knees. Rosa's "yesssssssssssss" of anticipated pleasure isn't at all muted and is, in fact, super fucking gratifying. She yanks her underwear down the rest of the way, carefully disentangling them from her uncharacteristically high heels. Rosa rests her knee on Mindfang's shoulder. 

It's not really a request so much as a clear expectation. Mindfang appreciates the directness but also does _not_ appreciate the assumption. Still, it's not the end of the world. Staring up like this affords her a phenomenal view. Rosa slumped against the wall, lipstick smudged, dress pulled up, face... God. Well. That just makes Mindfang want to tear her to absolute shreds.

She presses her lips to Rosa's inner thigh, drawing back to admire the obvious lip print against Rosa's pristine skin. Rosa knocks her hat off just so that she can yank her hair. Mindfang ignores this obvious incitement in favor of slowly kissing her way up her inner thigh. Her skin is soft and seems to almost demand further attention, which she's happy to give, dragging her lips and tongue and fingers up and down. She has a particular weakness for a woman's thighs, a weakness that... lots of people probably have, yeah, but, whatever. Rosa's inner thighs most certainly live up to previous fantasies, nicely shaped, lush and warmer than the rest of her. Fuck she'd like to feel them clenched around her cheekbones. Fuck she would really, really like that. 

Mindfang takes the opportunity to savor the feel of them, moving slowly across the terrain. Mmm going down on her, fingering her, tying her up and covering her in bite marks-- there's dozens of things that she can do that will involve feeling Rosa's thighs around her. She sucks at a particularly enticing area Rosa tugs her hair more urgently and, in the first moment of decisiveness since she was thrown into a closet, Mindfang sinks her teeth into her thigh. It's a wonderful moment, allowing her to hear Rosa gasp and moan with pain and get close enough to smell how aroused she is. 

Goddd that's gratifying. Rosa doesn't howl-- she appears to know that she can't get away with _that_ but she does whine, her hands scrabbling at the wall behind her She cautiously releases Rosa's inner thigh from between her teeth, stroking her tongue over the angry scarlet blotch. Fuck that's going to be an amazing bruise by the end of the night. Should she bite the other side too? She glances up. Rosa's eyes are only half open; her hands are limp in Mindfang's hair. 

"Have we learned our lesson or do you need me to demonstrate again?"

Rosa moans. It's not an informative response, but she doesn't try to stop Mindfang when she slowly climbs to her feet. She opens her eyes further and pouts, drawing her eyebrows into an expression of bewildered disappointment. 

"Can't you just stay down there?" Rosa mutters, clearly disappointed with this turn of events. 

Mindfang snorts and shakes her head. "We have to leave something to try at home, don't we?"

"I thought that's why handcuffs existed." 

Mindfang rolls her eyes, hoping that this is an acceptable reaction. 'Fuck yes, you're the best' is her actual feeling on the subject but, well. Rosa doesn't seem to need much more encouragement. Encouragement may, in fact, be the very last thing that's needed. She has to know she's going to get what she wants. But it's also, you know. Nowhere near as much fun for _her_ when Rosa's calling all the shots. 

"Fuck do you have any idea how long I've wanted you?"

Rosa nods. And nods. And nods. Mindfang snorts and reaches down to grab her hips, tugging them slightly. Rosa lazily lifts one of her legs, making it only halfway before seeming like she's going to give up. Mindfang reaches down and grabs it, her fingers curling around to prod the bruise on Rosa's inner thigh.

" _Fuck_ that's cold." Rosa hisses, jolting. Mindfang drops her leg quickly, feeling more like she's been scalded than frozen. 

"Sorry, sorry, I didn't think--"

"Did I say it was a _bad_ thing?" Rosa growls, grinning. Mindfang tentatively takes hold of her thigh once more, hoping that slower contact will make the titanium less of a non-sequitur against Rosa's warm skin. No reaction beyond the resumption of her blissful eyes half shut expression.

This definitely wasn't what she had in mind for their first time together. She was really, really planning on doing this right for once. Like. A nice dinner, some gentle build up, taking things very slowly. That's the basic version. None of the versions included Rosa getting wasted and then bullying her into having sex. This is deffffffinitely hotter, though. Like. If she was offered this scenario and a really sweet, romantic one... she would totally pick this one. Because 'sweet and romantic', in Mindfang's experience, usually _sucks_.

Mindfang slips her other, human hand between Rosa's legs. The instinct to immediately sink her fingers deep inside her is very, very strong. She's warm and wet and, while she's not as an optimal angle, it would still feel pretty damn great. But she's going to savor this, even if it's... intense impromptu closet sex. Also, it's their first time together. Taking it slow and going out of her way to ensure that Rosa's as aroused as possible can only be a good thing. 

She gently trails her fingers across her, grinning a little too hard when Rosa digs her heel into Mindfang's back and urges her forward. Accepting that doesn't seem like too much of a compromise and she closes most of the gap between them. Rosa buries her face against her neck. As Mindfang keeps lazily dragging her fingertips across her, Rosa begins to moan softly against her neck, a continuous noise that's occasionally accented by a gasp. It's a larger reaction than Mindfang anticipated, betraying either Rosa's sensitivity or just how desperate she actually is. Fuck. Fuck. WHY ARE THEY IN A CLOSET? WHY ARE THEY NOT IN BED RIGHT NOW?

She slips her fingers inside of her. Rosa yelps then moans, her hands wrapping around Mindfang's shoulders in a death grasp. Mindfang concurs. Fuck. Fuck, yes, _yes_. Three months she's been waiting for this and it has most certainly been worth it. Rosa's trembling against her, her fingers scrabbling against the fabric of her coat. The only problem with all of this is that she's fully clothed. But she doesn't quite mind it 

"Mmmm I see why you were so frustrated, darling." Mindfang teases, laughing a little. She curls her fingers and Rosa twitches, her moaning-- this time-- of a wholly different caliber. She's warm, she's wet, she's-- all of those suitably stereotypical descriptive phrases. The banality, however, doesn't make it any less hot. Rosa squirms, as Mindfang stays where she is, fingers inside her but not moving. She pulls them out slowly before thrusting back in, harder and faster than before. Rosa likes that even more, her moans barely muffled against Mindfang's skin. 

It takes a little more fumbling than strictly necessary to get her thumb against Rosa's clit. She wants to throw her onto a bed, sink her teeth into her throat and drive her fingers into her again and again, feeling her hips rise off the bed. Fucking her against a wall is, however, an acceptable placeholder. She keeps her fingers in place as she rubs her thumb against Rosa's clit in slow, measured strokes meant to tantalize rather than to please.

" _Stop teasing me._ " Rosa hisses, digging her nails into Mindfang's neck with bruising force. Mindfang gasps a little louder than necessary, hoping that encouragement won't go amiss. Fuck. She doesn't know how the night's going to end, but if it doesn't involve Rosa between her legs it'll only be because Rosa's too drunk to stay awake. And that sure as hell isn't going to happen.

Mindfang grabs her by the throat and yanks her head. Rosa stares at her and, so, so, so wonderfully, bares her temporary fangs and snarls. It's a moment Mindfang will remember on their wedding night, mostly because it is so _so_ perfect. As far as 'I realized I was in love with you when...' moments go, this is not the best one. But _fuck all_ is she perfect. 

"Ask nicely."

"No, I'm not going to--" Mindfang drags her thumb around Rosa's clit in a few outright strokes, and her sentence ends abruptly in favor of a loud, exaggerated "yessssssssssss" of pleasure. When the gesture is not repeated, she starts to struggle, digging her nails into Mindfang's neck. Rosa releases Mindfang's neck in favor of knotting her fingers into her hair, thumbs digging into her neck.

Rosa kisses her with an urgent frenzy, the kind of kiss that would normally entail slamming someone up against a wall. Rosa's already up against a wall, but the spirit of it holds true. She's definitely Mindfang expected, listening to Rosa's panting and the soft moans that keep escaping every time she moves to deepen the kiss. Mindfang gives up any attempt at control over the situation as Rosa begins to thrust herself against her fingers, struggling to get any sort of traction.

"Impatient, are we?" Mindfang murmurs, leaning over to kiss her throat. She strokes Rosa's thigh with her prosthetic arm. Rosa moans at the feel of it and Mindfang digs her fingers into her skin, exhaling sharply at the feel of her skin yielding to pressure. 

She is, for once, very grateful to be a much less badass version of that naked chick in Ghost in the Shell. Hey, no judgements-- when the movie starts off with your female protagonist naked, you can't expect her to remember all the details. 

All of which is to say that normally she hates having a robot arm because fucking someone with it is really, really dicey. Rosa doesn't mind it, even though she's definitely going to have some bruises by tomorrow morning. 

She braces Rosa's weight against her metal arm, nudging her leg higher up on her hips. It doesn't take too much effort to slip a third finger inside her, curling her fingers forward in soft stroking motions. Rosa keens softly and begins to moan with every breath, tugging Mindfang's shoulders. She starts to kiss Mindfang's neck, letting the points of her fake fangs press painfully into her skin. Each flitting of pain makes Mindfang feel a little more unsteady on her feet, made aware of her own needs. Fuck. _Fuck_. They need to get this over with so they can get home and fuck properly. 

"Come on, sweetheart, that's it." Mindfang murmurs, gently stroking her clit as she crooks her fingers. The sounds Rosa's making are the stuff of fiction, lovely mellow sounds drawn out by the slightest touch. 

"Harder." Rosa demands, breathlessly. She shifts herself against Mindfang's metal hand, rolling her hips in cadence with Mindfang's thrusts, rising up and down with moans that sound like drizzled honey. She's beyond caring about "Harder, please, harder--"

Mindfang groans. Oh god, yes, _yes_. She hastily steps back to shift position just as Rosa raises her hips to change angles. Rosa yelps in fear instead of pleasure as she starts to fall. In an attempt at gallantry that goes wrong too quickly to be anticipated, Mindfang rushes to support her weight once more. She intends to curl an arm around her shoulders but, in a moment of horror, she misses. 

And her arm goes right past Rosa's hips andddddddd straight into the drywall. Through the drywall, in fact. To the point that Mindfang thinks it maaaaay be ticking out the other side. It's her prosthetic arm, thankfully-- she isn't sure if her human one would be able to do this accidentally-- so there isn't any agonized screaming, bleeding or physical damage. She freezes.

"I said _harder_." Rosa growls, sinking her teeth into Mindfang's neck. Despite her predicament, Mindfang lets out a shuddering moan, voice fluttering. Fuck. Fuck, she could really get used to Rosa having fangs. Especially when the bite turns into an open mouthed kiss to her throat. 

"Rosa STOP STOP I'M STUCK IN THE WALL." 

"Oh my god-- oh my god, oh my god, are you okay!? What happened?" Rosa's still muzzy voiced from pleasure, the edge of her trademark intense concern only appearing when Mindfang removes her hand from between her legs and pushes her away.

"Rosa. Rosa I'm stuck in the fucking wall and you're going to rip my shoulder out of its socket if you don't get off me-- NO I AM _NOT_ OKAY."

"How are you trapped in the wall?!"

"I HAVE A ROBOTIC PROSTHETIC, OKAY! IT HAPPENS!" Mindfang whisper-yells, praying to all higher powers possible that her hand isn't sticking into the living room. She wiggles her fingers experimentally and, to her horror, she hears muffled screaming. And then someone hits her hand. Hard. With what could very possibly be a wine bottle. 

Yep, that's definitely a wine bottle. She twists her hand around to grab it, then throws it to the ground. There's more screaming. Someone comes at her with another object, this one with much less of a 'thunk' and more of an organic texture. She tries to extract herself from the wall but just ends up stuck in what's...... probably a pumpkin. 

Two things are good about this situation: first, her prosthetic surgeon has managed to give her 'feeling' without 'sensation'. She knows when she's touching things, but can't feel pain or pleasure. Which normally is something she'd _love_ to be able to do but, hey, probably good she can't right now. And two, that titanium is a poor conductor of electricity. 

"What the HELL is going on?"

"CYBORG ZOMBIE!" Comes the muffled, intoxicated cry. Seriously, Ted? SERIOUSLY? 

"SERIOUSLY TED ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" Mindfang yells, forcing her arm further through the hole to grab his arm and yank. "HOW MANY FUCKING CYBORGS DO YOU KNOW!?"

The screaming gets more widespread. Apparently this isn't helping. Rosa's doing her best to help, tugging in vain at Mindfang's elbow. It's pretty funny, actually, or would be if they hadn't been mid-coitus. 

* * *

Eventually someone realizes that they do, in fact, know someone with a robotic arm who is also, COINCIDENTALLY, in attendance at the party. Once someone points out that they're down a pirate it's a matter of time until Nekane finds her keys, unlocks the bedroom and peers into the closet.

"...Don't suppose there’s any fireman here?" Mindfang asks, guiltily, wishing she'd thought to tell Rosa to hide before the cavalry arrived. She looks like she may actually suffocate from shame as she frantically yanks her dress back down over her hips. Nekane has the grace to pretend she saw nothing, but does give Mindfang a pretty judgmental scare. The Day of the Dead facepaint makes it pretty effective. Mindfang feels her ears burning. 

Unfortunately, there aren't any firemen at the party. There's two guys dressed as fireman, and one woman dressed as a firehouse Dalmatian, but no one who can safely deal with this particular problem. 

She's pretty solidly embedded in the wall. When enough of it has been chipped away, it becomes very obvious that she's tangled up in the wiring. Mindfang's all for just, you know. Saying 'FUCK IT' and yanking it out, but apparently that wouldn't be appropriate. A kid working on his engineering PhD lives down the hall and while he's been drinking at his own Halloween party, he's kind enough to come over and safely disentangle her. 

Rosa stands in the corner the entire time, her face pressed into her hands. Mindfang's more upset on Rosa's behalf than on her own; this honestly isn't the first time she's done something stupid at Nekane's apartment; last time she accidentally destroyed an expensive modernist painting, so this year's 'hi, I punched a hole through your closet wall-- why was I in the closet? That's a rude question, maybe I wasn't ready to come out. No, I know that's a bad joke but like I don't know what you want me to say, Nekane' goes over okay.

Once help has arrived, it takes little more than ten minutes to get her disentangled, piece of drywall exploding outwards. Her knuckles are scraped with paint like a car door after a collision, but the damage seems to be superficial (which is more than can be said for the wall). 

Rosa's gone from the edge of orgasm to bright red in a mixture of horror and guilt. When Mindfang suggests they head back home, Rosa nods mutely and adjusts her dress as best she can. Mindfang puts her hat back on and tries not to curse her bad luck. Fuck. Fuck of course this would happen, of course it would.

Before Mindfang can ask if she's okay, Rosa's hauling ass into the bedroom. Mindfang follows at a more sedate pace, not exactly surprised to find her reapplying her lipstick in smooth strokes. She smooths her hair out, fusses over her dress a little more and then smiles, a little too blithely, over her shoulder. 

When they step out of the bedroom, half the room turns to stare at them. Most of them are amused and intoxicated, which Rosa seems to take as a 'WE KNOW YOUR SHAME' instead of a 'haha oops forgot you had a prosthetic arm, silly Mindfang getting stuck in a wall'. She wraps an arm around Rosa's waist and ushers her towards the door, shouting for Nekane to send the repair bill over. 

Rosa takes off towards the elevator at a half-sprint, repeatedly jabbing the down button. Mindfang doesn't take it too personally; Rosa might have been a bit more adventurous than usual tonight, but everyone has their limits. 

Rosa's silent for the totality of the ride back down to the ground floor, staring pointedly ahead of her. Her cheeks and neck are burning still, and her body language is so tense that her vertebrae seem in danger of detaching. 

They step out into the ultramodern lobby, Rosa attempting to dash for the front doors. Mindfang stops her with a gentle tug on her shoulder. Rosa stops immediately, but doesn't turn to see what she wants. Mindfang's forced to circle around to draw her into a tight hug, kissing her cheek. 

"Sweetheart, no one knows what we were doing. They weren't laughing at you."

"I know. I know." Rosa whispers, sniffling aggressively. She rubs at her eyes with her red-lacquered fingernails. Instead of being a good girlfriend and rushing to keep her from crying, Mindfang starts thinking about how great those nails would look scraping against her. "But I'm just. I'm so, so sorry Vienna."

"What for?"

"For putting you in that position. It wasn't fair for me--"

"Yeah, I really prefer doing things horizontally. Not super great at the vertical thing. It requires waaaaaaaay too much coordination, especially when I just want to, you know. Fuck your brains out."

"No. I mean-- yes-- I'm sorry for that, too, but I shouldn't have bullied you into becoming intimate with me--"

"Nottttt a problem, trust me. Pretty hot, in fact."

"But, um. You got your hand stuck in a wall because of me. I didn't-- I didn't meant to embarrass you, I just wanted to--"

"Rosa! It's fine! It's definitely not the first time I did that."

"Really?"

"Oh, yeah. Trust me. Car windows, regular windows, door knockers, bedframes, bookshelves, glass shelves, porcelain sinks, walls, closets-- if you can fall against it with your arm outstretched, chances are I have broken it with my hand."

"So you're not going to break up with me?"

"Rosa, you were so determined to get me to fuck you that you didn't notice when I embedded my hand into the wall next to you." Mindfang rolls her eyes and starts for the front door. "Who'd break up with anyone that dedicated?"

Rosa perks up slightly after this concern has been eliminated, her obvious relief making Mindfang's chest ache. It's nice to feel valuable to someone else, even if it's only for sex. And Rosa's probably not just using her for sex, if she waited for three months for it. 

The walk back to Mindfang's apartment is blissfully short and accompanied by a Rosa who seems slightly mollified, allowing Mindfang to hold her hand. The temperature has dropped at least ten degrees and Rosa's breath rises above her as her arms break out in goosebumps. Mindfang tugs her close and attempts to envelope her beneath her coat. It's nowhere near big enough for two women but it gets her laughing again. 

The doorman at Mindfang's building is still on duty, keeping a remarkably professional demeanor in the face of a pirate with a bitten up neck and a vampire who's clearly been the victim of someone else's ravenous desires. He smiles a little bit but, well, he's perfectly allowed to. The man's stuck working on Halloween instead of out doing something fun. If she's giving him the one fun moment tonight, she's glad.

"I'm going to tip him. You want to head upstairs?" Rosa takes off across the lobby at a remarkable pace, when the height of her heels is taken into account. 

Mindfang pulls her wallet out of her jacket, a floral patterned intrusion against her somber pirate ensemble. She hands Alan a fifty dollar bill and he snorts.

"Paying me to pretend I don't know what's going on?"

"God no, I like having a reputation for notoriety." Mindfang pats him on the back. "I'm paying you because I feel bad that you're stuck here holding the door instead of doing something way more fun. I'd bring you candy, but, you know."

She gestures towards Rosa, who's waiting by the elevator, arms folded beneath her breasts. She looks like she's out for blood in the best fucking way. Alan does know, thankfully, and she takes off towards her impatient girlfriend. The elevator arrives just as she makes it over. Rosa steps inside, eyebrows raised in challenge.

"Sorry, sorry." Mindfang follows her into the elevator, jabbing the penthouse button. Before the doors are even closed Rosa's pressed against her, kissing her. Mindfang's so startled she just gasps, horrified. Her hands settle on Mindfang's hips, thumbs slipping into her sword belt. 

"You should have been angry with me." Rosa purrs, dragging her lips across Mindfang's. She rises up onto her toes to wrap her fingers around Mindfang's jaw, tilting her head. Mindfang allows it, waiting on a psychological knife edge for the kiss to arrive. "If you were angry, I'd have to find a way to... make it up to you."

Mindfang can feel herself blushing and wishes, desperately, that she wasn't. But who cares. Rosa is fabulously attractive and is determined to get into her pants. Worst of all, Rosa's still not kissing her. It's probably been like five seconds but it feels like five fucking minutes and _fuck this_. She breaks the armistice in an aggressive flurry, leaning in and kissing Rosa gently. God her lips are soft. And warm. Sure she still tastes sort of like lipstick but it's still making her weak in the knees. She's way too infatuated with this woman.

She leaves Rosa to take charge, taking the moment to enjoy herself. This seems to meet with her girlfriend's approval as she grabs her by the coat and yanks, kissing her deeply. Her tongue slips into Mindfang's mouth, brushing against her lips. Mindfang wants to touch her but can't decide how, hands trembling from anticipation. Instead of touching her, Mindfang hums in approval, lightly pinching Rosa's lower lip between her teeth. Rosa growls and bites back, her fake fangs causing a lot more pain that Mindfang's light bite probably did. She moans, the noise deep in her chest. Rosa whimpers. Her embrace goes from passionate to overwhelmed, almost collapsing against Mindfang's shoulders. Fuck that's adorable. Woman sure as hell knows what she wants but isn't sure about getting it.

Mindfang gauges the potential for travesty in this elevator. No walls to punch through, no party just outside-- yeah, okay, she can work with this. Rosa gasps as Mindfang shoves her face-first against the wall and kicks her legs apart. She doesn't muster up a scandalized 'we're in _public_ , Vienna' so Mindfang takes it as consent.

"Do you know what I'm going to do to you when we get upstairs?" She whispers, tilting Rosa's head back, pulling her hair until her neck bends. "Ohh you poor little thing, I hope you can handle it."

Rosa moans, in what Mindfang takes to be either gratitude or encouragement. She drags her hand over Rosa's ass and grins. When she digs her fingernails in, Rosa drops her head against the wall and stomps her foot. She'd be willing to bet Rosa's stifling a moan. Aww that's cute. Because it's going to make it so much more fun to rip her to pieces. Mindfang tugs at her dress, the folded-under velvet of the hem dragging against her skin. 

Mindfang savors the feeling. They are two minutes away from ripping her dress off, throwing her into bed and devouring her. In the literal and figurative meaning. Right now she settles for raking her nails, sharply, up her thigh into her ass. Before Rosa can finish moaning, Mindfang sips her fingers between her legs. She's still warm and she's sure as hell wet. When Mindfang strokes her clit, she throws her head back, leaving it arched until Mindfang kisses her neck. God, she likes that. The noise she gets in response is pretty damn rewarding. 

So is, you know, the feel of her wet and waiting even after a pretty disastrous interruption. 

"Poor thing. Can't even wait until we're upstairs?"

"Hnnnn no--" Rosa moans, the letters distorted to x-men proportions around her still-red lips. Mindfang chuckles and she moans again. 

Ugh, she feels good around her fingers. Mindfang's forgotten how damn great it feels to having someone to touch. Someone who's tight and wet around her fingers. And, you know. Just. How fucking amazing Rosa is. Seriously, this was more than definitely worth the wait. 

The elevator dings and Mindfang exhales, gratefully. She desperately needs to have Rosa naked, right now. She glances up and, in keeping with the theme of this fucking comedy of errors, they aren't at her floor. A couple boards the elevator and the door closes before Mindfang can shoo them out. It's a middle aged man and woman who, upon realizing what the hell's going on, stare at them like they've both just confessed to being the Zodiac Killer.

"Sorry." Mindfang purrs, clearly not caring or even trying to subtly remove her hand from where it's found a new home. "She gets oh so horny when she has vodka, poor thing."

The couple continues to stare at them, wide-eyed until the husband threatens to call the cops, to which Mindfang responds, snorting, "well this is private property after all and unless you're a resident here you have no right to complain, also this is a fucking UP elevator so it's your fault for boarding the wrong one' but before the fight can escalate the doors are opening on to the penthouse floor and Mindfang tugs Rosa out. They rush to Mindfang's front door, Mindfang having to fumble through her coat pockets to find her keys. 

She has some trouble unlocking the door and Rosa isn't super fucking helpful about it. The moment the door unlocks, Rosa rushes inside. Mindfang has enough prescience to lock and bolt the door, then puts her intercom on silent because she cannot deal with indecency complaints right about now.

" _Vienna_!" Rosa yowls, from the master bedroom. Mindfang obeys without hesitation, silently praying that her kids don't call anytime tonight because she just wants to get that woman in bed and cling to her.

"What should we start with?" Mindfang starts to ask, unsure of Rosa's actual sexual experience. Not to like, you know. Hate on her. But if she hasn't been with a woman since college, she's out of practice, at the very least. 

Her question goes ignored however, as Rosa grabs her and yanks. Mindfang lets herself be led, grinning wickedly. Rosa collapses onto the bed, yanking Mindfang along with her. Her dress is easy enough to get off, Mindfang fumbling with the zipper and clasps while she contorts herself. She isn't wearing a bra and her underwear are-- fuck-- still in Nekane's closet. Her shoes are a little bit more difficult but, whatever. 

Mindfang sits up and shrugs off her coat, for once throwing it onto the floor instead of hanging it. Rosa unbuckles her belt with determined alacrity, yanking so hard Mindfang topples over her. Belt and sword clang onto the hardwood floor. 

She's surprisingly good at blindly unlacing corsets, which was the one difficulty Mindfang anticipated. Rosa's main difficulty is getting Mindfang's shirt off, tugging at the hem beseechingly. She actually whines and Mindfang slaps hands away to kiss her. 

" _Get it off_." Rosa snarls, yanking her hair. Mindfang yelps. She hastily complies with her demand, yanking her shirt over her head so quickly that her arm accidentally rips out one of the seams. Ugh whatever, there's a reason she has spares of every shirt she owns. Rosa sits up and unclasps her bra, smoothly gliding it off. Mindfang shudders and Rosa, still impatient, fumbles with her skirt and underwear at the same time, tugging. She doesn't make it far, since, you know. Her skirt is still tied shut. 

"Why are you wearing so much damn clothing?!" Rosa hisses, grabbing her breasts and yanking, roughly. It's not exactly sexy but it's _contact_ and feeling Rosa's cold hands against her nipples is the most sexual contact she's gotten tonight. 

Still, she shakes Rosa off and tsks softly. She climbs off Rosa and unfastens her skirt, standing and yanking the rest of her clothes off. "My dear, sometimes it's about the anticipation rather than the end result--"

"It's about _fucking_." Rosa grabs her by the robot arm and yanks. Mindfang falls onto the bed with a startled yowl that quickly turns into a moan when Rosa scrambles onto her. Normally she prefers being on top. But this could work, based on how Rosa's staring at her. 

She makes herself comfortable on the mattress, struggling when Rosa yanks her arms above her head and pins them there. It's the most darling attempt Mindfang's ever seen-- most people seem to realize 'oh shit she's got a robot arm' and just start with handcuffs. There's a pair in her bedside table, but this does not seem to be the moment to mention it. 

Rosa drags her hands across Mindfang's breasts, her eyes glazing over while she stares, smiling. Her fingertips brush over her nipples and Mindfang gives up on any attempt at keeping her cool. She closes her eyes and lets her head loll to the side, exposing her neck. Rosa strokes her nipples, gently, then-- in a remarkably coordinated act-- twists them hard while lunging at her neck. Mindfang howls, not able to discern between what actual pleasure is and what's shock. Both sort of feel like her breath being yanked from her lungs and her body's buzzing. Still, the point has to be made. 

"Fuck, ROSA, take out the fucking teeth!" Mindfang snaps. Rosa huffs but complies, reaching into her mouth and struggling to yank them out. She manages, at length, and sets them on the nightstand. 

She re-descends onto Mindfang, this time bypassing any obvious vampire references. She drags her thumbs across both nipples until Mindfang's squirming, frantically nuzzling the pillows in an effort to keep from moaning. Fuck. _Fuck_. Rosa replaces one of her hands with her mouth, tongue curling around one of her nipples.

"Mnnnn." Mindfang encourages, reaching up to curl her hands into Rosa's hair. Rosa grins against her. She keeps going, tongue working in elegant circles while her thumb keeps active at her other breast, roughly twisting it every time Mindfang moans. The woman is absolutely _ruthless_ and it's getting her wet as all hell. Mindfang lets her go until she feels dizzy, tugging at Rosa's hair. She obeys, switching her mouth to her other breast. 

"Touch me." She orders, not as authoritatively as she means to. There's a silent 'please' at the end of the sentence, when normally it's an obvious demand. Rosa doesn't begrudge her. It's rather sweet how eagerly she gets her hand between Mindfang's legs. She parts them quickly, whimpering at the feel of Rosa's fingertips dragging up her thigh. The damn siren was prepared for this, her nails cut short in anticipation of getting inside of another woman. Fuck. She likes a woman who knows what she wants. And Rosa defffffinitely wants her.

Rosa doesn't waste much time teasingly stroking her thighs and just goes right for it, thrusting her fingers inside her without warning. Mindfang hisses, tossing her head to the other side. She twists her fingers in Rosa's hair, wondering why they aren't taking this more slowly.

She exhales sharply when Rosa rubs her thumb over her clit. It's not the most elegant gesture, Rosa clearly struggling to get at the right angle. Mindfang, however, has no complaints about technique-- if it feels good, she's going to like it. 

Rosa tentatively thrusts inside her, hard, twitching her fingers. Mindfang closes her eyes and tries to breathe evenly, corralling her excitement. She'd forgotten what it feels like to have someone inside her and she's certainly delighted to feel Rosa inside her. That thought alone reduces her to blissful moaning. 

"A little harder... faster... mmm yess, please-- right there, yes," She requests, incoherently. Rosa glances up from her breast without releasing it, teeth grazing her warningly. But she behaves herself and takes the instruction. 

Mindfang’s fingers and toes are numbing with how much she's moaning. It's not great sex but _damn_ it still feels the best she's ever had. She manages to coordinate herself long enough to yank Rosa to attention.

"Kiss me?" She pants. Rosa grins and complies, instantly. They kiss erratically, Mindfang breaking off to moan with increasing regularity. Eventually she gives up on doing even _that_ , keening loudly against Rosa's lips. She thrusts deep inside her, listening to the intensity of Mindfang's moaning to hit just the right places. 

Okay, she was wrong. This is damn great sex. Who cares if she's clumsy. Mindfang lips her hips off the bed, breaking off their kiss to gasp against Rosa's neck. Her orgasm comes on slowly but arrives intense. For a few moments she forgets that she's the owner of several extremities and clings to Rosa. The pleasure's intense after so many months getting herself off, Mindfang attempting to prolong it as long as possible by rocking her hips against her. Rosa's more than happy to keep going, stroking her clit until she's hoarsely begging her to stop. 

Rosa leaves her fingers inside her until Mindfang's slumped, bonelessly, against the pillows. Fuck. _Fuck_ that was great. Not long, not complicated but _so perfect_. The feeling of her fingers slipping out, intentionally dragging against her still over sensitized clit.

"Mmm good girl." Mindfang murmurs, reflexively. She's still warm and tingly, not wanting to move from where she is. Rosa snorts, sitting back on her heels. She stares, pointedly, while she slips her fingers into her mouth. Despite herself, Mindfang moans again, a strangled, frustrated noise. 

Okay, yep. She's a keeper. Mindfang would definitely be willing to shoot someone just to keep her in bed.

"What do we say, sweetheart?"

"Don't try that on me." Mindfang growls, narrowing her eyes. Rosa smirks.

"Give me a minute, love." Mindfang purrs, rolling her eyes. "You should have gone first since I've been such a tease."

"Really, Vienna? Because I didn't want you to rush the job because you were horny." Rosa sounds pretty damn close to scathing. Mindfang props herself up on her elbows and glares.

And then gets a good look at her. Her nipples are pierced, a pair of silver rings augmented with tiny red stones. Mindfang stares up at the ceiling and counts to ten. 

She waited _three months_ to get this woman in bed. Three. Months. She's been missing out on this-- WHAT THE HELL? She groans. Yep, okay, bask in the afterglow later, get inside this woman now.

Rosa shrieks and laughs when Mindfang shoves her onto the mattress. Thank fuck for king sized beds. And padded headboards, oops. Rosa winces, but doesn't seem dissuaded by the injury.

There should probably be some foreplay involved here, but, you know. She's had the woman against the wall twice tonight, she's pretty damn ready to go. Still, it's a matter of common curtesy. 

"Do you want me to go slow or--"

"If you even _think about_ prolonging this I'm-- I'm going to--"

Mindfang rolls her eyes. Rosa's not great at thinking on her feet or, in this case, with her libido. She cuts Rosa off with a kiss, nearly losing it when she tastes herself. 

She wants to get those damn rings between her teeth. But she also feels sort of guilty about leaving her on the edge for so long, poor pet. Still, it can't hurt. She leans down to return Rosa's gesture but--

Rosa slaps her. Nope, okay, it can hurt. She lied to herself on that one. Still, not exactly a problem. Although, for future reference, Rosa can hit pretty damn hard. Probably be careful with that. 

Mindfang sighs, melodramatically. "I'm going to start here and work my way down. Is that okay, your highness?"

Rosa doesn't look at all amused. Mindfang still thinks it's funny. Although she really does prefer being the haughty one, so probably a good thing Rosa's not super excited by that. 

Still, she takes the hint and crawls between Rosa's legs. She doesn't make any attempts towards coyness, bending her legs and letting her knees fall apart. 

Mindfang smiles. Normally she'd start off with some touching but, well, she's done enough of that. Rosa fidgets, impatiently, digging her fingers into the comforter on either side of her. 

She kisses her way down one of Rosa's thighs, smirking at the sight of faint lipstick smudges against her skin. She reaches up with a slightly shaky hand and spreads her apart, inhaling sharply when Rosa moans with relief. 

The moment her tongue brushes against her, Rosa's moaning goes from something that sounds more like an implied 'fucking _finally_ ' to the more classic implied 'yessssss'. She tastes like an aroused woman, which isn't exactly unexpected, but there is, as always, a unique, lingering flavor that's impossible to put into words. It feels good to have her beneath her tongue, gliding slowly up and down her.

Rosa writhes more than is possibly necessary, working her way down the bed to increase their contact. Mindfang doesn't waste time satisfying her, quickly adjusting herself to expose more of Rosa's clit. Poor thing. She drags her tongue across it, experimentally. Rosa twitches. She tries a circle. Rosa's hips rise off the bed. Therrrrrrre it is. 

It's not hard to find a pattern to it, working in circles and strokes with enough happenstance that Rosa's reduced to clenching her thighs around her head in an attempt to keep her from stopping. Aww, poor girl. Just as Rosa moans deeply, Mindfang pulls back and bites her thigh, hard. Her legs part again and she takes the moment to slip her fingers inside her. Yep, still feels great. She curls her fingers sharply forward, digging them in.

Rosa likes that, too, quick to show her appreciation by making so much noise Mindfang's super damn grateful she got the place soundproofed (and there aren't even any kids around). Fuck, she'd like to see this display with Rosa handcuffed and unable to thrash like this. Shit, now that's going to be in her head until it happens.

"Mmm let me hear it, sweetheart." Mindfang murmurs, pressing her lips against Rosa's already bruising thigh. She's tense as all hell, whimpers broken up by panting. Mindfang slips her fingers out, just to watch Rosa struggles to remain close. Her back arches at an incredible angle. Mindfang sits back just to watch, stroking her clit just to keep her going. She struggles for a few seconds then collapses back onto the bed, looking defeated. 

"Please?" She asks, hoarsely, sounding so utterly dejected that Mindfang just wants to kiss her senseless. But that's not exactly fair. The woman's waited three months to get laid and this is the third attempt _tonight_ to make that happen. 

It doesn't take too much work to get her to come, much to Mindfang's dissatisfaction. Rosa might have been in the mood to make it a rush job, but she sure as hell was hoping to drag things out. Still, working her tongue around Rosa's clit while curling her fingers inside her is... everything she'd hoped it would be. 

Rosa turns out to be one of those women who sobs her way through orgasm in sharp little gasps that sound nearly hysterical. She actually sinks her teeth into her own arm, trying and failing to keep her composure. 

It's beautiful to hear. Not because she's an incorrigible romantic thinking in purple prose but because she's just so damn happy to see her overcome with pleasure for once.

She doesn't steal Rosa's trick of overstimulation. Rosa doesn't look entirely like she can handle it, eyes shut and her chest heaving. Mindfang hastily wipes her fingers clean on her duvet, momentarily regretting not turning it down before they fucked on top of it. 

Mindfang crawls up the bed to lie beside her, coaxing Rosa into lying in her arms. She makes a happy noise, not mustering up the self-control to open her eyes. 

"How was it?" She asks, almost nervously. Shit why is she nervous?'

Rosa snuggles in closer, resting her head against Mindfang's breast. "Satisfying."

"I sort of thought this would be more of a romantic marathon, taking hours to, you know. Get to know you. Lots of candles."

"Fuck that." Rosa grumbles. Mindfang's startled by her language, startled enough that she starts laughing. 

Mindfang tenderly kisses the crown her of her head. Normally she's up for multiple go-rounds but right now she just wants to hold her. "Poor girl. I'll take care of you properly next time."

Rosa shrugs, softly. "I was promised handcuffs. There are no handcuffs."

"Nightstand, middle drawer." Mindfang mutters, rolling her eyes. Rosa seems almost disoriented, her face, chest and neck all flushing a dusky shade of red. Ugh that's so attractive. "I'm going to go get some water. Do you want anything, sweetheart?"

"Alcohol. Food." Rosa says, hazily. Mindfang gently eases her way out from underneath her, yanking the blankets down so Rosa can crawl underneath them. She does so gratefully, without so much as a word of thanks. Poor vampire's all tired out. 

* * *

There's an industrial-size mixing bowl left out on her kitchen counter, filled with the candy she'd bought for building trick or treaters. Since she'd forgotten to put it out both tonight and during last week's building-specific trick or treat, it's still full to the brim... and there's more left in the pantry. She probably shouldn't have bought her Halloween candy in bulk because she _never_ gets any kids here, anyways, but some part of her was fully cognizant that she'd have an excuse to eat tons of candy. Which is always a good thing. 

She'd like to bring Rosa her favorite candy. Or something suitably romantic. But she doesn't actually know what she likes. Nor does she have champagne. What she _does_ have is chocolate wine, something called "hallo-wine" and a massive ass bowl full of enough fucking candy to make Vriska disruptive in class for the next year. Shit, that's what she should have done. Sent it to school with Vriska to give out to other kids. Still, hindsight is 20/20. Which is ableist because she only has one working eye so it's more like 10/10 hey-o!

She takes the whole stupid bowl, throwing a few water bottles into it and carrying the alcohol in one shaky hand. God she's shaky. More excited about what just happened instead of, you know. Worn out. She glances down at herself and makes a strangled noise. Oh god look at her, she's covered in lipstick. What fucking brand does that woman use? She likes it. But it's probably waterproof, fuck. 

Rosa's sitting up in bed, snuggled in between the velvet headboard and several pillows. She greets Mindfang with a tired smile, self-consciously reaching down to pick up the sheets. "Hey." She murmurs, blushing.

Mindfang drops the bowl onto the bed. Or, well. She throws it. She throws it onto the bed as she trips on one of Rosa's shoes, the wine and wineglasses barely surviving. After a panicked gasp, Rosa starts laughing, so hard that Mindfang's momentarily concerned that it may be an allergic reaction. She sits up to peer over the mattress like a dolphin surfacing to say 'fuck you beachgoers, I'm a motherfucking dolphin I swim in the ocean and mock you' but is still afraid to get beach balls thrown at its face. Nope, Rosa's got her face in her hands, shoulders shaking, laughing.

"Oh shut up, Rosa. It's not like you haven't... ever... thrown a bull full of candy at your... girlfriend."

"That was a really well-constructed sentence. Aren't you a creative writing professor?"

She sets the wine and glasses on her nightstand then dives into bed, bouncing. Rosa yelps, dissolving once more into giggling. This is the most Mindfang's heard her laugh this month, possibly the entire time they were dating. "Shut up and eat your candy."

"You're not expecting me to eat all of this, are you?" She picks up a fun size pack of Reece’s Pieces, staring in wondered horror at the sheer amount of candy. Mindfang has zero idea how many kinds she bought: Vriska insisted on being the one to pick out the candy this year, and she just went with it. It's better than starting a fight with a tiny hormonal monster. Also she can say, when asked why she spent almost a hundred dollars on Halloween candy, that her sixth grader did it. 

Mindfang rolls her eyes and yanks some of Rosa's pillows away. She groans with displeasure, greeting her offered embrace with a hopefully-feigned scoff of disdain. Rosa semi-reluctantly settles in against her, head resting in the hollow of Mindfang's neck. Her half dozen earrings are cold against Mindfang's neck, small flurries of cold metal and stone mounted in warm skin. "No, only half."

Rosa crawls into her arms with a happy noise-- yep, okay, feigned disdain, girlfriend doesn't hate you-- settling in against her. She rests her head just above Mindfang's breasts, forehead pressed into her neck. Mindfang strokes her back idly, still really damn pleased she's as soft as she looked like she'd be. Like, seriously. Three months spent kissing her goodnight and holding her hand and, you know. Hugging awkwardly long. If Rosa didn't have super soft skin, that would be totally fucking fine because she would be-- and always will be-- worth it no matter what. But her actually being that soft? That's just like. Some kind of cosmic reward that might even balance out losing her arm. It, at least, balances out years of terrible romances and her fucking awful husband. 

Like, you know. He wasn't _awful_ awful but just awful in a "GOD WE SHOULD NOT HAVE GOTTEN MARRIED" sort of way. She liked him well enough to have two kids with him so, you know. But not enough to stay with him to raise said children. After _that_ he got really awful. Mostly because she gives herself permission to be as bitchy as possible when her children are concerned. 

Wait. No. Bitchy as possible about defending her kids? Being bitchy about people who are awful to her children? Not like, being bitchy _to her_ children. She does her best to be as _opposite_ of bitchy as possible to her children. 

She kisses the top of Rosa's head, nuzzling into it. Whatever pomade she uses smells really damn good and HEY! RED LETTER DAY! It's not as awkward to smell your girlfriend's hair at length when you're in bed together. Hahahaha. ALL of the benefits! They are ALL HERS.

"Is your friend going to be mad about her wall?"

"Eh not really. I'll send her some flowers and promise to pick up some art supplies the next time we're in Malta. And, you know. Pay for her to fix it again."

Rosa snorts. She shakes Mindfang's hand off her head, then rips open a package of M&Ms with her teeth. Mindfang takes the cue and rips apart a Kit Kat. They settle into amicable munching for a few seconds, Rosa fidgeting for a more comfortable position against her.

"So would it be racist of me to suggest we watch Buffy?"

"Why... would that be racist? I haven't seen it but, um, I've never heard of any prejudice against Moroccans in it...?" Rosa looks adorably confused, nose wrinkling back as she cocks her head.

Shit. No. Wait, shit. That's not great. Fuck she keeps forgetting Rosa's half Moroccan. Which is weird because, you know, she herself is as Scandinavian as the sons and daughters of Skyrim. So, you know. Nordic. "No. No, it's a joke, Rosa. Because you're a vampire-- I mean, you were a vampire for Halloween. And it's Buffy the Vampire Slayer. So. Like. She kills vampires?"

"You didn't think this one through, did you?" Rosa's face is doing something weird. What the hell is that supposed to be?

"No, Rosa, I did not." Mindfang sighs. Should she apologize? Probably. "Sorry. That was preeeeeeetty thoughtless." 

Rosa shrugs, fumbling through the candy avalanche. She eventually finds a tiny package of junior mints, also ripping that open with her teeth. "I know what you were trying for. And I'm only watching it with you if you promise to _stop talking_ during it."

"Ha ha, Rosa." But, you know. Valid complaint. Mindfang nuzzles her until Rosa glances up, then she catches her in a kiss. She tastes like mint and Mindfang remembers senior year Halloween, camped out in her basement playing spin the bottle.

Landing on another girl, everyone making jokes about it. Going for it and finding out, haahhh okay yep, sneaking feeling confirmed to definite fact-- she _did_ (and does) like girls and boys. The other girl's face completely forgotten, but the memory of the mint flavor of her gum earning a more permanent place. Her father kicking the door open and storming downstairs with a fucking Smith and Wesson 19 in one hand and an unlit Molotov cocktail in the other. Everyone at the party screaming and racing, hysterical, out of the house. Her father asking what was wrong with his costume. Having to point out that, DAD you looked like you were going to kill my friends. Dad pointing out that he was married to a disgraced FBI consultant who became a district court judge. Mindfang had pointed out that, in all honestly, their marriage was based on breaking laws and doing stupid shit. And then he'd agreed and started shooting the wall. 

Ahh. Family memories. She digs her hand into Rosa's hair, the feel of it bringing her back to the current moment. Rosa breaks away, breathing heavily. Mindfang smiles. 

"I'm going to find the DVDs. Be right back."

Rosa insists on coming along, putting on one of Mindfang's dressing gowns. Mindfang, of course, immediately tugs it off her. Rosa picks it up and puts it back on. Mindfang shoves it off. Eventually they compromise for 'wearing it but not tying it at all'. 

Mindfang finds the DVDs while Rosa fights with the microwave, first unable to get it started, then burning a bag of popcorn to a bag of charcoal. They figure it out eventually, laughing and flirting across the granite countertops.

Her bed seems so much more homey with Rosa sprawled out next to her, slouching against Mindfang while inhaling an uncanny amount of popcorn and fun sized candy bars. Mindfang isn't one to judge; she's drinking chocolate wine and hoarding the Kit Kats. They're cozy beneath the heavy duvet, Mindfang savoring Rosa's warmth. She hasn't had anyone in bed with her for ages and... it's nice. It's nicer than usual because she _seriously_ may be in love with her.

Eventually they both wind down, Mindfang covering Rosa with kisses from behind her ear down to her shoulder, tracing over her beautiful contours. Rosa melts into her, her normal rigidness dissolving in the face of pleasure. 

"We need to think of a couples' costume for next year." Rosa mumbles sleepily, kicking the blankets away. Mindfang yanks them back up, already cold. 

Mindfang wonders how much of a problem they're going to have with the blankets. She doesn't want to be the one keeping her girlfriend out of her bed. Ugh, pronouns. This all gets so confusing, sometimes. "Well I'm always a pirate so, you know. Plan around that."

"Compromise is what keeps relationships alive." Rosa reminds her, in a singsong voice. Mindfang's 88% sure she uses that fucking line on the kindergarteners in her district. Next she's going to remind her of the golden rule and then, uh. Well, she'd like to make a sarcastic comment about 'your changing body' and basic sex ed, but that seems a little weird given that Rosa's naked in her arms.

Mindfang kisses her again. She could honestly do that all day. Rosa always gasps a little, like it's some kind of fucking awful meet cute. Except it's actually heart-meltingly sweet. "Fine. I go as a pirate and you get to keep the blankets on the bed."

"Does that mean I have to be a wench? Or am I also a pirate?"

"Noooo be the wench. Be a _vampire_ wench."

Rosa snorts, pressing her face into Mindfang’s shoulder. Her eyelashes tickle against her skin, a crystalline sensation in a world of physical intensity. Mindfang's never seen anyone so beautiful. Or known anyone so lovely, an acerbic woman who's spent her career tending to other people's children, fixing everyone's problems. Mindfang has a visceral need to take care of her, to make sure she knows that she's got someone to carry her the rest of the way up mount doom. 

"I love you."

"I already put out."

"So? I still love you even if you're way more of an exhibitionist than my liability insurance will cover."

Rosa starts to scowl, crossing her arms beneath her breasts. Fuck. Ugh Rosa getting annoyed is like, the worst. Once she's annoyed who the hell knows what she'll do.

"Don't be petty. If my affections could be bought with great sex, I'd still be married." Mindfang kisses her, soundly, lacing her fingers around Rosa's and squeezing softly. "I love you."

"I love you too." Rosa whispers, smiling against her lips like she's Galileo and she just discovered Jupiter. Her smile is wide and unabashed. It's hard to kiss her when she's this happy, and that might be a problem in the future.

Mindfang's phone buzzes, barely audible beneath the Buffy theme song. Her heart immediately skips a beat-- it's almost midnight and the only reason anyone would be calling is because something has _happened to her children_. She falls getting out of bed, burning her knees against her bedroom rug. Her phone is in her jacket pocket and she scrambles to answer it before it goes to the answering machine. 

Oh. Okay. It's just... six mis-delivered text messages that just got sent.

"Are you okay...?" Rosa asks, softly, understandably concerned about her partner's sudden swan dive. 

Mindfang nods, climbing guiltily back into bed. "Sorry. Mom problems. Thought my kids were in trouble."

"Are they?"

"No, my mom just fucked up sending a bunch of text messages. She's allowed to pass judgement on multimillion dollar embezzlement cases but can't figure out how to work an iPhone." She opens the text messages and, yep, definitely her mom. A few garbled messages about her father being a pain in the ass, one about Vriska being a pain in the ass but not as much of a pain in the ass as the 'older one'. And, of course, lots of pictures.

She shows those to Rosa, grinning proudly at the pictures of her children going door-to-door. Rosa, uh, stops grinning when there's a picture of her kids with her father who, as always, is dressed as Jack the Ripper. 

"I should really check on my girls." Rosa says, with a faint twinge of guilt. "Porrim was supposed to be home an hour ago and I have no idea what Kanaya is up to."

"Uh. You don't know where your sixth grader is?"

"Oh! Oh _god_ no! She's staying with a friend of hers from ballroom dance class."

"Why is Kanaya taking ballroom dance lessons?"

"I don't know. I worry about her socializing, she can be a little awkward. And when she did sports she was a little over competitive so I just let her pick."

"And she picked... ballroom dancing." Mindfang slumps onto the mattress, absently checking her e-mail. Rosa slips out of bed and puts the stupid robe back on, this time tying it. 

Mindfang watches, breathlessly, while she strides across the room, picking through the tiny purse Mindfang hadn't noticed her carrying most of the night. "Vienna you know my daughter, why are you surprised by this?"

"I'm not, really. I'm just mostly really fucking happy about how _Kanaya_ that is." Mindfang sits back in bed, tapping out a text message to her parents to remind them that Aranea can't have coffee and that Vriska's got a doctor's appointment so make sure she takes her damn medication for once. "Is it Rose Lalonde?"

Apparently her phone isn't in the tiny purse. Rosa tosses it onto the dresser, then stuffs her feet into Mindfang's slippers. Ugh there is something so fucking entrancing about seeing Rosa in her pajamas. "Do you know _her_ too?"

"Yeah, I taught a creative writing course for kids one summer. Her mom does freelancing for private space exploration companies so, you know." Mindfang shrugs. Her mom texts her back with a 'stop hovering' and her dad just says 'fuck off'. "Kanaya's in good hands. They're probably like, harassing horses or something."

"Why horses?" Rosa almost shouts, struggling to be heard all the way from the living room. 

Mindfang shrugs. She likes horses. They're nice. She prefers boats, of course, and always picked sailing lessons over riding at summer camp but she definitely took dressage lessons until she was thirteen so, you know. Horses are cool. "They both ride. They've got like... five horses or something? I have no idea, I've only been there a few times."

"That's nice. Kanaya likes her a lot, it's nice to see her with a friend who doesn't seem, uh. A little overpowered by her." Rosa laughs, awkwardly, clearly uncomfortable doing anything close to criticizing her baby. "She can be a little determined sometimes."

"Yeah, we had a debate last year about who should win the Pulitzer. She hadn't read any of the books but she was fucking sure of herself." Determined is just a nice way of saying 'stubborn as fucking fuck' and/or 'sort of a smug bitch sometimes'. Which is still better than Vriska, who is more of a 'proud to the point that she shoved a kid off the jungle gym in second grade just because his shoes were the same color as hers' type of bitch. 

"OH MY GOD." Rosa shrieks. Mindfang automatically flails, tensing her hands automatically. Predictably, her phone screen shatters in her robot hand. Fucking hell. This is the second fucking phone this month. Thank god she keeps spares. She broke two phones last month when she forgot she had a weird robot hand while hungover.

"Rosa? Uh? You okay?"

"OH MY GOD MY BABY!?"

Rosa rushes into the room, already struggling to tear her robe off. She starts to frantically climb into her dress. It's a tight velvet party dress and isn't cooperating with her, at all. Mindfang wants to admire the view but it really doesn't seem like the time.

"Rosa, calm down! What's wrong? What happened?" She gets up, rushing over to her desk to extract the sim card from her phone. There's a few backup ones in there and she inserts the card into a working phone.

Rosa sounds like she's having a panic attack, wheezing horribly as she fights to get clothed. Mindfang half considers pointing out that _this_ is why she should keep backup clothes here. 

"Porrim got arrested!" Rosa finally manages to burst out, her voice cracking about three times. 

Well fuck. That's a mood killer. "I'll get dressed."


End file.
